i miss the times when our love was so carefree.

I <3 YOU

early monday morning.

its been a really long time since i posted anything.


6th months has passed with that special someone.
yet,
i'm still feeling so lost tonight.
i never knew,
that whatever I've done,
was in vain.
Rain or shine,
I've always been there.
yet,
you still feel the way that you feel.
Maybe I'm still the shitty Konrad that i was a year ago today.
the big screw up that couldn't be bothered bout the direction of life.
whatever i've done til this day,
i've done it for you.
i'm trying so hard to meet you on days that i have not slept or feel really tired.
but yet,
you still the way you feel.
i've gave up what i wanted,
to spend more time with you and i was overenjoyed when i knew i had a 8-5 posting,
b'cos i knew i had more time with you,
but that doesn't seem to be the point now ain't it?
i've gave up alot of myself for you,
and i don't mind,
neither do i wanna bitch bout it.
sigh.
i'm just really lost now.
haven't we been really happy?
i just didn't know why you have to say the things that you said.
it really hurts,
to know that whatever i've done,
isn't really appreciated.
i just can't seem to figure out whats wrong.
probably its me.
it has always been me all my life.
i'm always the fucking problem in everything i've done.
...


i love you,
i miss you,
i wanna spend the rest of my life with you.